


Brothers in Arms

by firenewt



Category: Before Crisis: Final Fantasy VII, Compilation of Final Fantasy VII, Crisis Core: Final Fantasy VII
Genre: Cute, Drama, Gift Fic, Humor, Light Angst, M/M, Prompt Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-25
Updated: 2019-02-25
Packaged: 2019-11-05 08:34:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,397
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17915438
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/firenewt/pseuds/firenewt
Summary: Rude and Kunsel get stuck waiting for retrieval during a mission, and end up unexpectedly sharing more than they intended.





	Brothers in Arms

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ZiggyPasta](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ZiggyPasta/gifts), [TwoCatsTailoring](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TwoCatsTailoring/gifts).



> Written for FVII Rare Pair Week 2019, Day 4. The prompt was "events".
> 
> Written for ZiggyPasta and for TwoCatsTailoring, even though this is not a rare pair or even an OTP for either of them (as far as I know). But I wanted to do something for them and thought they might enjoy something like this (I hope so!)
> 
> FSR stands for First Strike Ration, developed as a ration for elite forces while on the move. Much more compact than an MRE.
> 
> Inspiration from the scene from Dances With Wolves, with the mule driver at the campfire, and from our rp on twitter. 
> 
> *** see notes at end for bonus (nsfw) content! ***
> 
> Disclaimer: Thanks to Square Enix for letting me play in their world.

It seemed quite straightforward. There were whispers of corruption in Corel. The CFO was spending more time in Costa del Sol than where she was supposed to be. Supply deficits occurred too often to be coincidence. Employees who seemed to exist on paper could never be found in person. When a shipment of explosives meant for use in the mines mysteriously disappeared, Shin-Ra decided enough was enough. They sent in two of their best, both known for having a wide array of skills, and for excelling in subverting authority, and for covering their tracks. It takes one to know one, as the saying goes. Thus a Turk and a SOLDIER found themselves on a raid to ferret out whatever secrets were festering under the hood of the Corel Mining Company. 

Rude and Kunsel had been dropped on the arid plain outside Corel two days ago, carrying just what they needed to survive in the many pockets of their specially designed camouflage uniforms. They needed to move fast and light to complete their assignment, which was to get in; find what evidence they could of nefarious goings-on; get out; and get far enough away that they could be retrieved without Shin-Ra’s involvement being noticed. 

They had come in on a supply helicopter: the chance to do some aerial recon before being left on the ground was invaluable. They had hidden in the chopper while it was being off-loaded and refueled…the pilots took care of that, as the cargo was deliberately minimal for this trip. After lifting off again, and once it was beyond the mining installation’s tracking abilities, the helo circled around, veering from its assigned flight path long enough to drop them, leaving them to their own devices. Their deployment had been timed to coincide with the beginnings of a sandstorm coming in from the north. They made their way toward the town, then holed up and waited for the storm to arrive; once it was in full force they could use it as cover to enter the mining offices proper.

Sandstorms were common in the area, especially at this time of year, and this one had been building for days. The townspeople, being used to such events, had their routine preparations down pat. The mine shut down topside. Those protected underground continued working unless it was a category three storm or higher. Then they, too, stopped work, as the chance of a power outage was too great. Businesses were closed, protective shields lowered over windows, and the population hunkered down to ride things out. The wind and the airborne sand and dirt played havoc with communications and radar, and the static electricity that could develop often shorted out generators. It also tended to make people quite cranky. 

But the only things that the intrepid pair cared about at the moment were that the streets and buildings would be deserted, any sensors would be unreliable, and it was time to move. 

Once within the boundary of the town they made steady progress toward the mine’s headquarters. Even though there was no one else on the streets, they used whatever cover they could, instead of just making a beeline to their destination. They slipped along the edges of buildings, checked at each open area before crossing it; like two sand wraiths they drifted in and out of the curtains of sand and dust that swirled in the air. Even if someone had seen them, to the casual eye they appeared to be townsfolk, dressed in the kind of clothes that any miner would wear: non-descript brown and beige jackets with hoods and deep cowls that could be drawn up as needed to protect the nose and lower face; loose pants tucked into boots; gloves; and wide wrap-around goggle-masks to protect the eyes.

They arrived at their goal, finding it closed and shuttered, of course. The door was slightly recessed, giving some slight protection from the elements, and, by mutual agreement, Rude disabled the alarm while Kunsel shielded him somewhat. With the alarm down, it was the work of a minute to jimmy the lock, and they were in. 

Kunsel shut the door behind them, and, in the sudden comparative quiet, they stood still for a few minutes and listened intently for signs that anyone but them was in the building. Kunsel’s superior SOLDIER senses gave him the all clear. He motioned to Rude, and they both lifted their goggles to the tops of their heads and lowered their cowls. Having spent the last couple of days in a steadily increasing storm, it was a relief to breathe freely. 

“Computers or books?” Rude kept his voice low, even though they were alone. 

“Oh, computers, computers, computers are my friends!” Kunsel said cheerfully. 

“Fine. Be as quick as you can.”

“Hop hop, like a Jumping! It’s off to work I go!” Kunsel pulled a rolling chair over to the desk where the computers sat, and made himself comfortable. He cracked his knuckles and then poised an index finger over the keyboard. “Here goes nothing!” he said.

“It better not be nothing, after all this,” Rude said. “Just get on with it.” He disapproved of Kunsel, in principal and personally. He would rather have been here alone, but it was not his decision to make. And, he had to grudgingly…very grudgingly…admit, the man was very, very good at what he did. And it was no secret that Kunsel held the same opinion of him.

“Get on with it yourself,” Kunsel returned. “The storm’s supposed to last a while, but there’s no guarantee how long we’ll have the place to ourselves.” Each man put on a pair of thin black gloves that would not leave any fingerprints and buckled down to work, laser focused on his job, and working as quickly and quietly as he could.

Rude didn’t bother to answer Kunsel. He was already starting to search the place. The light was dim. Although it still daytime, the windows were covered, and they didn’t want to chance attracting any attention by turning on the overhead lights. The Turk began to methodically but quickly and thoroughly cover every possible place where sensitive things might be concealed. He went immediately to the connecting offices, and started there: it was more likely that someone would hide things in their personal space, rather than the main lobby, but one never knew. First he used his eyes, then his sense of touch, to scan the rooms, looking for anything odd, anything that didn’t quite match, in the walls, ceiling and floor. Then he moved on to the furniture, phones and the electrical fixtures. 

They were not quite sure what they were looking for…Kunsel knew from experience where to look in the computer files for irregularities; he was dealing more with volume than having to search for a needle in a haystack. The tricky part of his job was to get past any passwords, firewalls or other cybersecurity without locking himself out or tripping any alarms, and then get out again without leaving any trace of his snooping. Rude could be looking for anything from ledgers to files to external hard drives to hidden cameras or microphones. He had to search carefully and also leave no evidence that anything had been disturbed. 

Two hours later, Kunsel sat back with a sigh. He looked around and found Rude on his hands and knees, tucking a corner of the carpet back under the baseboard. “How’s it going for you?”

“Done. You?”

“Just finishing the download. Midgar will be drowning in juicy gigabytes when we get this back to them!”

“Then do something useful while you’re waiting. Like, I don’t know, checking the weather.”

“Byte me,” Kunsel suggested, but he pulled up the meteorological reports for the area. “Uh oh,” he muttered. “Looks like we’re not going anywhere anytime soon. There’s a series of storm cells piling up on the tail of this mother.” He glanced up at Rude, who had come to look over his shoulder. “Chopper can’t fly in this. And communications are on the fritz. We can’t arrange another time or place for pick-up.”

“Well, we can’t stay here. We’ll have to ride it out and wait until they can come for us.”

Kunsel considered. “We’ll have to get to the rendezvous coordinates and wait there. They won’t find us if we aren’t at least in that area when they show up.”

“First things first.” Rude opened his jacket and began stowing away the bits and pieces of physical evidence he had found: microphotos he had taken of several files; a duplicate ledger; a list of contacts; and a record of IOUs. The small items were secreted away safe from the elements in anti-static bags and secured from accidentally falling out of a pocket. He handed Kunsel a disc. “Can you copy that? It’s got audio and video on it. I don’t want to take the original unless there’s no choice.”

“Can do.” Kunsel slipped it into another machine, fished a blank disc out of one of his myriad pockets and inserted it, too. At that moment, his download finished, and he removed the memory stick, bagged and stashed it, and turned his attention to exiting the system and shutting everything down. By the time he was finished that, the disc was copied. He popped them both out, and handed them over to Rude, who added the copy to his haul and went to replace the original in its recorder. 

They met back in the lobby by the door. Both took a last look around, making sure that there was no sign of their little visit. Kunsel moved the chair back to where it had come from. “Happy?” he asked.

“Happy with this. Not so happy with that,” Rude said, jerking his head toward the exit. The wind was shrieking now instead of howling.

They made sure their outfits were secured, raised their cowls and lowered their goggles. “This is going to be a bitch,” Rude muttered.

“You said, it, bro!” Kunsel laughed, and went to the door. He had to push hard against the wind just to get it open enough for them to slip through. There was nothing they could do about the sand that blew in; they’d just have to hope that it would be assumed that it got in under and around the door frame. Rude locked the door and re-set the alarm, and then they turned to face the street. The visibility was almost nil. “Stick close!” Kunsel yelled to make himself heard, and they stepped out into a yellow hell.

Luckily, it wasn’t far to the edge of town and they were able to retrace their path to that point quite easily. They used the buildings as much as possible to block the wind and as a guide to make sure they didn’t take a wrong turn. However, once they were past that protection, it became harder to navigate. Under any other circumstances the smart thing to do would have been to find shelter immediately and stay put until the storm abated. But they couldn’t do that this close to town. They had no choice but to keep going, and get as far away as possible before they stopped. 

Both men were fit and tough and experienced but the wind pushed at them so hard it was difficult to keep their balance at times, let alone stay on a straight course. Kunsel’s SOLDIER strength made it easier for him to move so he took point, letting Rude stay on his leeward side. Sand and debris filled the air, making it hard to breathe even with their cowls; if they hadn’t had goggles they would have been blinded in minutes. As it was, the abrasive grains found every tiny opening in their clothes, adding itchy irritation to their problems. The desert heat felt like a furnace. Sweat ran down their necks and bodies under their clothes, and their eyes stung, but they couldn’t take off their goggles to wipe them.

All they could do was stagger on, sometimes holding on to each other for support or to make sure they didn’t get separated. They lost all sense of time, and soon they weren’t sure in which direction they were actually going. As long as they didn’t run into any buildings or fall down any mine shafts, then at least they could be reasonably sure that they were still moving away from the town and out into the open countryside. 

Eventually it became clear that it was getting dark, not just debris obscuring their vision. Rude was plodding along behind Kunsel, head down, just concentrating on putting one foot in front of the other, when the SOLDIER stopped and Rude plowed into him.

“Oof! Watch where you’re going!” Kunsel said.

“Very funny,” Rude replied, his voice muffled by his cowl and the wind.

Kunsel put his head close to Rude’s so they could hear each other better. “It’s getting dark. I think it’s safe to stop now, at least for tonight. No one is stupid enough to be out in this besides us. I’d hate to keep going and get all turned around and end up back near town. We’ve been taking a chance that hasn’t happened already.”

Rude nodded. “Agreed. Next dune we find that’s big enough for us to get behind and out of the wind, we’ll stop.”

“Righto.” Kunsel had kept himself facing the direction they had been walking in, so that he could continue leading them that way. It was easy to get disoriented when there were no visible landmarks. They resumed their tired march, and it wasn’t long before they stumbled – literally – down into a dip. It wasn’t deep, but it was enough that they could both fit in its shelter once they dug a bit into the side of the small dune and shoved the sand up around themselves, creating a kind of wall. They took out the emergency blankets that were thin enough to fold flat and small and fit in a pocket and had been coated on one side with a desert camouflage pattern; they used one to hide under, giving them some shelter and a breathing space out of the wind and debris. They weighted the edges down with sand and tucked the corners under themselves. It was stifling underneath, but at least the air was calm.

Rude maneuvered his collapsible canteen out. He took a couple of swigs. He could have drained the whole thing in one go, but they were already dangerously low on water, and they were rationing themselves severely. He handed it to Kunsel, who also drank sparingly, and gave it back. 

“Hungry?” Rude asked.

“Not so much that I want to try and choke down an FSR right now.”

“Okay. Let’s get some rest. Who knows what we’ll be dealing with tomorrow.”

“Yeah.” 

Kunsel wriggled around, making himself a hollowed out nest that somewhat supported his back and neck. Rude was jostled and even squashed a bit as the SOLDIER got comfortable. They were both big men and the space under the blanket was very small. Their boots stuck out and were soon covered with sand; they kept the majority of the blanket sheltering their bodies and heads. It was hot and dark and cramped.

“You’re lying on my shoulder.”

“Well, your butt is in my side.”

………………..

“You’re snoring."

“So are you.”

“How can you tell if you’re asleep.”

“I’m not asleep.”

“Then how come you’re snoring.”

“Are you going to shut up.”

“Maybe. Are you going to stop complaining.”

“Maybe.”

…………………

“I’m thirsty.”

“Don’t talk about water. It just makes it worse.”

“I suppose SOLDIERs have some sort of super water storage system so they don’t get thirsty like us regular folk.”

“Yup. We have internal water recirculation tubes connected to storage bladders. We just have to drink once a week, like camels, and fill up, and then off we go. It saves on having to carry canteens with us or stop and drink. Very efficient.”

“You drink internally from bladders. Ugh.”

“Figure of speech. ‘Storage sack’ sounds suspicious.”

“You’re right. I don’t even want to go there.”

“Ah, but many do. Another SOLDIER perk. People always want to know what else about us is super. Super sized. Super strong. Super duper.”

“I don’t.”

“You wanted to know about the bladders, didn’t you. We do have actual super bladders, too, y’know. Handy for not having to make a lot of pit stops.”

“Now I have to pee.“

“Don’t think about it.”

“It’s hard not to, with you going on about bladders.”

“Aren’t you Turks trained to have some sort of mind control so you can ignore pain and hunger and various other bodily functions?”

“Yes.”

“Well, then.”

“I failed Bladder Ignoring 101.”

“Great. Just my luck to be stuck under a blanket with a Leaky Louie.”

“A what??”

“Leaky Louie. A cadet who just couldn’t hold it. His nickname’s lasted longer than he did.”

“Poor guy.”

“Poor guys in his squad.”

“We have Stinky Rod.”

“What? Stinky Rod? Like, your guy Rod? Or referring to something else?”

“Our guy Rod. I tell you most solemnly, you do _not_ want to share a blanket with _him_.”

“Heh! I’ll have to look into that when we get back!”

“I shouldn’t have mentioned it. Although, it’s not really a secret. Hard to keep something like that, um, under wraps.”

“Under wraps. Good one.”

“I suppose SOLDIERs never have that problem.”

“Nope. Super sphincters. Nothing gets in or out without super special permission.”

“…that’s TMI.”

“Kind of like this…”

_Brrrrp!_

“You did not just do that.”

“Heheheh”

“You did. You dirty rat. You filthy dirty pigdog.”

“Just trying to make you feel at home!”

“I’m trapped in a cloud of super SOLDIER stink. We can’t even lift the blanket and air it out. Good gods! What have you been eating?!”

“Just our yummy FSR’s. Same as you.”

“I can’t breathe!”

“Aww, quit moaning and use your super Turk mind powers! Picture yourself in a green meadow with a fresh breeze and flowers all around and you braiding daisies into your hair. Oh, sorry, you don’t have any hair. Well, making daisy crowns, then.”

“I hate you.”

“I think you’d look precious in a flower crown. Even with the sunglasses.”

“Shut up.”

“YOU shut up. You’re the one who’s yakkity-yakking. I must say, for someone who’s supposed to be so quiet, you’re awfully chatty.”

“Let’s both shut up.”

“Alrighty-righty! Nighty-nighty, Chatty Kathy!”

“I don’t want to know where that comes from.”

“Heheheh”

“…I still have to pee.”

It was a long, long night. Both men eventually dozed, out of pure exhaustion, but between the heat and the sound of the wind outside their little blanket shelter and the lasting effects of the other wind _under_ the blanket, and being crammed up against another sweating body, it was less than restful. 

Rude jerked suddenly out of a nightmare of being eaten alive by a Malboro. The stench of its hot breath as it slowly bit down on him was hard to shake. He jackknifed, clawing at the blanket that wrapped around his head, thinking that he was still in the monster’s mouth.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, there, what’s up, my man!” Kunsel was instantly alert with the abrupt flurry of movement and the panicked noises Rude was making. The sudden light and fresher air as well as the sand cascading all around them was momentarily a bit confusing, but Kunsel pulled the blanket from Rude’s head despite the Turk’s flailing attempts to fight him off. Rude looked around wild-eyed, panting, one hand on his heart, as he slowly came out of the nightmare and realized where he was. 

“You okay, dude?” Kunsel asked, deliberately not looking at him. Instead he focused on getting out of the little pit they were in, scrambling to his feet and trying to avoid getting sucked into more sand. He sorted out the wadded up blanket and shook it, then folded it into its tiny square again and put it in a pocket. Nightmares and night terrors were an unavoidable a part of military life. No one escaped such experiences. It was an unspoken rule to give the afflicted person some space to collect themselves, without drawing undue attention to them. 

“Y-yeah.” Rude scrubbed his hands over his face, waiting for his heart to slow down and the feeling of suffocation to fade. “M’okay.”

“Splendid! Then time to get a move on while we can!” Kunsel held out a hand, and hauled Rude to his feet. “Watch your step. It’s easy to turn an ankle in this loose sand.”

Rude nodded, brushing himself off and looking around. The storm had ended for the time being. The wind was more of a stiff breeze at the moment, and the sky was yellowish and low, with a bank of darker yellowish clouds on the horizon. 

“Looks like the next storm cell is forming,” he said. “We need to move before it hits. Any sign of pursuit?”

Kunsel had been scanning the horizon in all directions, checking for just that, and shook his head. “Not that I can see. Which doesn’t put us completely in the clear, but so far so good. Now we just have to get to the rendezvous point and hope the helo can pick us up before we get socked in again.”

“Which way do we go?” Rude was patting his pockets, looking for his compass. “I need to get a reading…” He pulled out the device and fiddled with it. While Kunsel waited he had a drink from his canteen and then passed it to Rude. “Well?”

Rude shook his head. “We are so off course. Farther than I thought from town, but we’ve been moving out into the open desert. We need to correct…” He pointed out the direction, and let Kunsel have a look at the direction finder while he drank. 

“Alright.” Kunsel squinted at the sky again, gave Rude back his instrument, and made sure his clothes were secure and his cowl and goggles ready for use if necessary. “You ready?”

“Uh…a minute.” Rude turned and took a few steps away. Kunsel grinned and waited. Rude returned shortly, looking more set to face the day. “You don’t have to go?”

“Super SOLDIER bladder, remember? So, are you ready?”

Rude also made sure he was properly suited up. Then he reached into a breast pocket and pulled out a pair of sunglasses and slipped them on. “Now I’m ready,” he said, staring at Kunsel deadpan.

“Pfffft!” Kunsel chuckled. “Alrighty, then let’s mosey!” And he turned and led off in the corrected direction.

They slogged along. Shortly after noon, the sand gradually petered out and transitioned to a hard-baked surface. It was easier to walk on and they made better time but they still had to watch their footing. The ground was dry enough to have cracked in many places and often the holes were partially hidden by loose debris. It would not do to fall or injure themselves at this time. The landscape was mostly empty, with bits of scrubby bushes growing low to the ground. Occasionally a giant tumbleweed came at them and they had to do some quick maneuvering to get out of the way: even though they were easy to see coming, the big balls tended to move unpredictably. The bank of clouds on the horizon behind them slowly grew closer. 

At the edge of the true desert they stopped briefly to check their location and adjust their course again. They shared the last water in Kunsel’s canteen and each ate one of the FSR bars that they carried; they weren’t the best tasting things but they were small, convenient and provided concentrated energy. 

Kunsel made quick work of his, gulping it with a slight grimace before washing it down with his share of the water. “Never get used to these things,” he muttered.

Rude ate his more slowly, but he agreed. “You’d think with all the technology and brilliant brains Shin-Ra has at their disposal that they could come up with something more appetizing.”

“Like a vitamin pill or something, that could give you all your daily nutrients. Or a long-lasting injection.”

“Too bad SOLDIERs need to eat,” Rude said. “No super stomachs?”

“Nope,” Kunsel sighed. “It’s a downfall, I admit. I guess it was a choice between the water bladders and adding a few more stomachs for food storage. Somebody must’ve won a coin toss.”

“You want the rest of mine?”

“Nah. Wouldn’t wanna deprive you. Enjoy.”

As the sun, or what they could see of it, set, they paused again to decide what to do. “We’re about another four or five hours from the rendezvous coordinates,” Rude noted, studying the compass in the dying light. “We could carry on and try to get there before we have to stop and take shelter again, or stop here and wait this next storm out. Any preference?”

Kunsel kicked at the ground, then turned to look at the approaching clouds. The wind was starting to pick up small bits of soil, and the granules peppered his face and the front of his jacket, sounding like rain starting to fall on pavement. 

“Honestly, If I was by myself, I’d make a run for it,” he said. “I’d rather be as close to the pick-up point as possible, just in case. You never know. But…” he let the sentence hang, biting his lip. 

“But I can’t run as fast or for as long as you,” Rude finished for him. There was a short silence.

Kunsel shook his head and gave him a lopsided grin. “BUT, I was going to say, the smart thing is to stay put and make a shelter before the weather hits, rather than keep going and then try to find a place in the dark when it’s getting really bad. I never said that making a run for it was smart. You never know how long one of these storms will be. We were just lucky that the last one blew itself out so quickly.”

Rude scowled. “I don’t need to be coddled. I’ve survived worse than this. And I can keep up.”

“Listen,” Kunsel turned serious. “I get it. You can keep up. Okay. You don’t have to prove anything. I dunno about you Turks, but where I come from, we work together. Technically you outrank me, but we got sent on this mission as equals, as a team, because we’re both needed. So, do we really have to fight about this? Cuz if you wanna fight, that’s not gonna go in your favour. And we’re almost out of water. If you win you’re gonna be awfully thirsty, sitting on my carcass in all your glory. So, you wanna pull rank?”

Rude sniffed. He was normally not someone who felt he had anything to prove. To anyone. He was more than confident in his skills, and had reason to be: there were few who could outperform him, in any way. He knew it was no shame to admit that the SOLDIER had greater speed, strength and stamina than he did: he was enhanced, and Rude wasn’t. Simple as that. And intellectually, Kunsel had nothing on him. Rude was mature enough to put his pride aside, be realistic and make the proper decision. “No,” he said. “As you said, the smart thing to do is to stay put.”

“Excellent,” Kunsel said. “I really didn’t want to have to break those glasses of yours.” He gave Rude a wink and jogged off for a quick recon. 

Rude frowned to himself, shook his head, and moved past his annoyance with the SOLDIER. He busied himself trying to get a signal through to their support team, as he had several times that day, but the weather was still interfering. He had just packed away the transmitter when Kunsel came back, and led him to a cluster of low brush that was growing in a rough semi-circle. 

Kunsel enlarged the inner space and then, while he brought back some bigger rocks and arranged them around the bushes for some protection, Rude cleared the area where they would be lying as best he could. Then they stretched one of the emergency blankets over the brush, tying it to the small branches and anchoring the edges with more rocks so that it wouldn’t blow away. The result was crude, but it gave them a space to be protected from the wind and whatever it carried. And it gave them more room than they had had the previous night. 

As it was now dark, they didn’t bother to hang around outside. Both of them took the opportunity to take a bathroom break, even Kunsel deciding to relieve the pressure on his Bladder of Steel before they got settled.

He crawled into the little shelter, where Rude had already chosen a spot. They both had to fold themselves up and twist and turn to fit comfortably and it took a while to negotiate what body parts were going to go where so no one ended up with an elbow in their gut or a knee where it shouldn’t be. But they were able to sit, albeit hunched over or semi-reclining, which was a relief.

“Damn sand gets everywhere!” Kunsel complained, squirming around. “My butt itches, my balls itch, my eyes itch…I can even feel it between my teeth!”

Rude gave him a side-eye. “Really. You just love oversharing, don’t you.”

“Oh, come on! You can’t tell me you’re not feeling it, too! Unless you have some fancy Turk sand repellant you’re not telling me about! 

“Let’s get the other blanket over the end so more can’t get in, how about.”

“Fine! Shoulda done that before!” Kunsel grumbled.

“There. Happy?”

“No. But it’s better. Just in time, too. Listen.” The change in the wind was audible, and the blankets shuddered but the shelter held.

Kunsel pried an FSR bar out of one of his pockets. “What’s for supper tonight, hmm? Apple-cinnamon or chocolate? Apple-cinnamon it is!” He tore it open and nommed it down. “Blurgh.” He wiped his mouth and stuffed the empty wrapper back into his pants. “How about you? You should have something to eat. Pick one of the fruit-flavoured ones. It’ll fool you into thinking you’re not as thirsty.”

“I’m not hungry.”

“You really should eat something. Even if you’re not hungry.”

“Maybe later. My stomach kind of hurts.”

“Yeah, well, welcome to FSR and MRE world. After a few days, they either give you the shits or bung you up so bad it takes a week to flush everything out when you get back home.”

“I know. Not complaining. I’ll eat something later.”

“Alright.”

They were quiet for a while, but there was nothing to do, and rather than waste their limited battery power on light, they decided to just go to sleep. If nothing else, sleep made the time pass more quickly and let them forget about how thirsty they were.

Since both of their blankets were being used for the shelter this time, they were glad of their layers of clothes. The colder temperature at night was always a surprise in the desert, even in a summer storm, but with both their bodies producing heat in the limited space, it was quite reasonable.

Kunsel started snoring almost immediately. Rude lay there and listened to the noise by his ear, each inhalation sawing on his nerves, until he couldn’t stand it anymore. He nudged Kunsel in the arm a few times, which made no difference. Then he poked him hard in the ribs. “Hey!”

“ssssnnnNNRRTT! huh? wut?”

“You’re snoring.”

“srry” Kunsel fell back asleep right away, having decided that an angry Turk leaning up on his elbow and staring down into his face did not constitute something to be concerned about.

Sighing in relief, Rude lay back down and closed his eyes. He was just starting to drift off when the buzzing rumbles started up again, jerking him out of his drowsy state. 

Growling, he leaned back up and this time pushed Kunsel’s shoulder hard, at the same time shoving the SOLDIER’s butt with his knee. With some mumbling, Kunsel rolled onto his side and was quiet, and Rude was finally able to fall asleep.

Rude didn’t know what time it was when he woke. He could vaguely see the outline of the brushy twigs on the inside of their shelter, so he thought it must be close to dawn. He lay there, gradually becoming more conscious of his surroundings. His back and hip hurt from lying on the hard cold ground but the rest of him felt strangely cozy, and his head was quite comfortable. It took him a minute to remember that there were no pillows on missions, and realize that his head was resting on Kunsel’s arm. He tried to inch away, but he couldn’t move. Kunsel’s other arm was wrapped around him and even in his sleep his SOLDIER strength had Rude firmly restrained. And no wonder he was so warm. Due to their increased metabolism, SOLDIERs had a slightly higher than normal body temperature and it was definitely noticeable when one was close to them. And Rude was very close. Sometime in the night, Kunsel had rolled near to him and decided he would make an excellent body pillow to snug onto. 

And then Rude also became aware of the fact that two big men who had been physically very active for days and unable to wash or change clothes created quite a ripe smell, especially in such a small enclosed space with little ventilation. He was rather glad he hadn’t eaten the night before. 

But it was time to get up, and he had to resort to using his elbow again. “Hey. Kunsel. KUNSEL. Wake up, you big oaf. Time to wake up! Let me go!” 

Rude felt the SOLDIER’s breathing on his neck suddenly stop, then the constricting arm let go and Kunsel moved back as quickly as Rude scooted forward. He turned to see Kunsel sitting up, blinking and knuckling the sleep from his eyes. “Heh. Sorry ‘bout that,” he said sheepishly. “I didn’t…was asleep…”

“No problem,” Rude said, dismissing it. “Not like it hasn’t happened before.” He pulled his jacket straight and retrieved his goggles from the corner where he had set them for safekeeping. “I have to go out for a minute. Grab the edge of the blanket, will you, so we don’t get a bunch of sand blown in here.”

“Uh, sure, sure.” Kunsel obediently held the blanket while Rude went out, and then secured it again after he came back in. 

“Um.”

Rude looked up from shaking grit from his clothes. “Sorry, am I getting it on you? I’m trying not to.”

“No, its fine,” Kunsel said absently. “I was just wondering…what did you mean, it’s happened before? You’re talking like, in general, right? I mean, like when you’re in the field, sleeping rough with other guys, right?”

Rude scratched his chin, considering. The SOLDIER across from him was looking at him with a quizzical expression, his forehead a bit wrinkled. 

Finally he nodded. “Yeah. Just a general comment. It happens, you know.”

“Right, right,” Kunsel nodded, his face smoothing but still looking a bit dubious. Then he gave a little chuckle. “Bet you’re itchy now,” he teased.

“Yeah, well, it was better than the alternative. The stink is already bad enough in here.”

Kunsel sniffed under his arms and shrugged. “It happens, right?” he said, trying to look innocent. With his sleep-creased freckled cheek and his red hair sticking straight up on one side, he was quite successful.

Rude snorted. “Right.”

“What’s it looking like out there?”

“Hard to tell. Can’t say it looks like it’s going to stop soon.”

“Gods, the meteorologists sure fucked up with the weather predictions this time, didn’t they.”

“They don’t care. They’re not the ones who get stuck out in it.”

“Too true. I can’t count the number of times we’ve been sent out with the wrong equipment and had to just suffer through whatever hit us.”

They passed most of the day chatting about missions; catching up on the gossip from various departments; comparing scars; dozing a bit; and making a couple of necessary trips outside. As night closed in again, the talk gradually died away. Their mouths were dry, and even with snacking on the FSRs, they were both suffering from the lack of water. In addition, they were both feeling a bit awkward about the position they had woken up in, and, as they arranged themselves for the coming night, neither one of them wanted to bring it up.

After all the shuffling and maneuvering and grunting died down, and both were as comfortable as they could reasonably be under the circumstances, they were silent. 

“Well. Goodnight, then.” 

“Yup.”

It was quiet except for their breathing, and the sound of the storm outside, but they both knew the other was lying there with open eyes. They could almost hear each other’s brains whirling. This night, there was no snoring, as sleep eluded them both.

Time passes differently at night: thoughts drift, chasing down one rabbit hole after another, and it’s hard to tell how many minutes have actually gone by. A frighteningly short period of time and an inexplicably long period of time can both feel the same. Either way, being alone with one’s thoughts at night is far different than being alone with them during the day. 

Kunsel had been restless for quite a while, huffing to himself and heaving sighs every now and then. Rude was still, but could feel the other man’s frustration as he fussed. He wasn’t surprised, then, when Kunsel finally cleared his throat a little, and whispered. “Rude? You awake?”

“Mm.” 

“It’s bothering me.”

“You don’t say.”

“I do say! It’s been bugging me all day! What you said this morning.”

“Mm.”

“I’m not an idiot, you know. You were going to say something else. And then you decided not to. What were you going to say?”

Rude didn’t respond.

“Rude? Come on, man. What is it? What’re you sitting on? Its driving me nuts.”

“I imagine it must be, for someone who loves to sniff out every last bit of private information he can.”

There was a chuff of exasperation, and a growl. “I WILL find out. One way or another.”

“Mmhmm.”

“Bastard.” 

More time passed. Rude wasn’t sure if Kunsel had finally fallen asleep, as he had been quiet and not moved for a while.

“Alright. If you really want to know. But you may not like what you hear. In fact, I’m sure you won’t,” he whispered quietly. If Kunsel was asleep, he could feel good about at least offering to tell him, and it wouldn’t be his fault that the SOLDIER missed out. 

But Kunsel immediately wiggled around to face Rude in the dark. “Tell me,” he said. Rude couldn’t see his expression, but his tone gave a good picture of the set determination on his face.

“Alright.” Rude debated how far back to go, and decided to summarize as best he could. “Two years ago, there was a mission to the Icicle area. To Gaea’s Cliff on the Great Glacier. There had been some electromagnetic anomalies coming from that area for some time, and there were,” he paused, uncertain how to describe it, “certain other indications that there was something there that was giving off a lot of energy. So, of course, Shin-Ra wanted to find out what it was. And, of course, Hojo pushed for a mission as soon as possible. And he specifically insisted that you be included on the mission. Do you remember that?”

“I…I don’t…Hojo..? I’m not sure,” came the slow reply.

“Well, he did, and so you were. It was a small group. There was you, and a few support personnel, and Tseng sent me along to keep an eye on things, and, well, you know. Make sure we knew what Hojo was up to.”

“…we’ve worked together before?”

“Yes. That was a crazy mission.” 

“Crazy how? Crazy can cover a lot of things.” Kunsel sounded trepidatious.

Rude hesitated. “Look, I don’t pretend to understand everything that went on. I just know that you were the focus of it. You were really out of it…had been for a while, after your last couple of mako treatments. We’d been watching you, because of that. Something happened to you when you were down in the Labs, and then you were…it seemed like you were tuning into whatever was out there. As soon as we got to the Glacier, we had to keep you from heading off into the snow without any supplies, without waiting for any of us. You just…took off, like you knew exactly where you were going.”

“I…did..?”

“You did. My orders were to let you go where you wanted, and just make sure you didn’t fall off the mountain or freeze to death or something. _Your_ orders were to find the energy source. And long story short, that’s what you did. You led us to the Cliff and a crater in the Glacier and then basically collapsed, like someone pulled your plug.”

“…the cave…” Rude was concerned at how vague Kunsel’s voice sounded, and hoped to all the hells that the SOLDIER wasn’t going to go into some sort of fugue state like he had before, at that time. He had always felt that it was wrong to keep all this information from Kunsel. Goddess knew _he_ would be furious if he found out that someone had kept something this major from _him_. But…he wasn’t Kunsel. 

“Are you okay? You don’t sound too good.” 

“I….yeah, I…it just sounds so weird, but so…familiar, like I can almost remember what you’re talking about. I just got this wave of cold over me when you said cave….I’m all goosebumps. It’s not cold in here, but…I feel cold.” 

“Do you want me to stop?” 

"…no. No, go on, I want to know. I…need to know…” 

“Okay. Well, I guess acting like some sort of homing device was really draining, because you were eating everything in sight during the whole time. You acted like you were starving. But when we got to the edge of the Cliff, you were done. Burnt out. I had to force you to eat, and, um, keep you clean,” Rude said delicately, “and keep you warm. You were shutting down and your body temperature took a big nosedive. You know that’s a sign of real shock in SOLDIERs, and yeah, I’d say you were in shock.” Rude shook his head in the dark, remembering. 

“…it was so cold…” 

“It was. We had to wait a few days to be picked up, just like now. There was a blizzard, and the chopper couldn’t get to us until the weather cleared. It was pretty touch and go there. We lost the support troops. When we got back to Midgar they took you right to the Labs instead of the Infirmary, and…well, when we saw you next, you were pretty much normal physically, but you didn’t seem to remember anything about the mission. Just me and Tseng knew what had happened out there…and I was told to just forget about it myself.” 

There was a silence. “So, why are you telling me all this now?” 

“I just…I would want to know if something like that happened to me. I would want to know if someone had been…messing with my mind, using me like a guinea pig,” he said. “It wasn’t right, not at all, to do that to you!” It came out much more forcefully than Rude had intended, but he couldn’t take it back. It was how he truly felt. It made him sick to his stomach to even think about. He was privy to a lot of dark things, as a senior Turk, but seeing how the company used one of their own like this was a red line for him. It called into question many other things that he didn’t even want to consider. 

And now he could feel the anger and confusion radiating off the other man, and he wondered if he had done the right thing in bringing it all up. 

“I…don’t even know what to say.” 

“That must be a first for you,” Rude said, trying to lighten the mood. 

Kunsel didn’t take the bait. “You still haven’t told me what you were gonna say this morning.” 

Rude sighed. Damn him for such a sharp mind, even in the face of having been given such disquieting information about himself. “Well, when we were stuck on that glacier, I took care of you, right. You were freezing. In shock. You know survival training for warming a person with hypothermia. Skin to skin contact is best, right. Sooo…” Rude drew it out, then continued. “You tend to be very cuddly, you know. I spent a lot of time being a Turk teddy bear for those few days,” he said dryly. 

“What??!” 

“Mm.” This time Rude waited to see how Kunsel would react before he responded, so he could take his cue from him. 

“Should…should I apologize?” Kunsel wondered, sounding unsure, a state that rarely occurred for him. 

“Of course not,” Rude reassured him. “It was no problem. Perfectly normal, under the circumstances.” 

“How about…thank you?” 

“Forget about it. Oh…poor choice of words, sorry. Uh, don’t worry about it. You’d do the same for me. Right?” 

“I wonder,” came the thoughtful response. 

Somehow, that took Rude a little aback. “Well, be that as it may. In any case,” Rude paused. “Are you okay?” 

“I’m…not sure. It’s a lot to take in. I think…I think I remember bits and pieces, I thought they were dreams, but…” he stopped. “I don’t know. I have to get my head around it all…” the SOLDIER’s normally confident voice trembled just a little. 

“Yeah, “Rude said sympathetically. “It’s a lot. It’s a really shitty thing. I’m sorry.” 

This time there was no reply. Rude lay there for a while, having second and third and fourth thoughts about their conversation. Over the past few days, somehow they had unintendedly veered from professional interaction to more casual banter to venturing into very dicey territory and now the whole tenor of their relationship had abruptly changed. On the one hand, he totally regretted it. But on the other, he felt he had done the right thing by sharing what he knew. Where things went from here, he had no idea. How did one even begin to deal with such information? He just hoped Kunsel could somehow handle it. 

It was impossible in such close quarters not to hear the labored breathing next to him, and after a while, Rude made another decision. He reached out a hand in the dark, feeling for Kunsel’s shoulder, and laid his hand on it. “Hey,” he said quietly. Taking a deep breath, he hitched himself closer to the SOLDIER, until he was close enough to be able to put his arm around him and snug him gently close. “It’s okay,” he murmured. “I’m still here.” 

There was a strangled gulp and Kunsel let out one sob, then sniffed mightily. “Th-thanks,” he whispered shakily. 

It was a while before either of them managed to fall asleep. 

When they woke, it was full light and the wind had dropped quite a bit. Kunsel gave no indication that he was in the least bit troubled by anything. It was business as usual, and Rude respected his apparent decision not to dwell on the revelations and emotions of the night before. He’d leave it up to the SOLDIER to pursue whatever he wanted, or not. 

After a trip outside, Rude confirmed that the storm had finally blown over, and they had another relatively clear spell in which to finish their journey. In short order, they were on the move, hiking the last leg to the previously arranged rendezvous point, trying to ignore their thirst. The transmitter was still not working, but Kunsel tied one of the emergency blankets to the tallest bit of brush that they could find. He flipped it so the shiny reflective side was facing up instead of the camo, and then they sat and hoped that their signal would be seen by a friendly retrieval team instead of anyone from Corel, and sooner rather than later. 

Fortunately, the support helicopter had been making circles in the air as soon as they sky cleared. Since they, too, were not able to use their coms, they had to resort to an old-fashioned standard search pattern, looking for any sign of the missing operatives while they could. Soon the flashes from the sunlight reflecting off the blanket were seen, and shortly after that the chopper landed long enough for the Turk and the SOLDIER to climb gratefully aboard. 

As they lifted off again, speeding back to Midgar with the intelligence that they had gathered, Rude and Kunsel toasted each other with the bottles of water they had immediately demanded. 

“To us!” Kunsel said. “I didn’t think working with you would turn out to be so…enlightening. Here’s to a great partner…and a great friendship.” His tone went up a little at the last part, the unfamiliar insecurity creeping into it again for a second. Apparently, he was not as unaffected by all that had happened as he appeared. 

“Likewise,” Rude said gravely. “To friendship.” He could agree to that as a start, for sure. 

“Could we, y’know, talk more later? I’ve...got a lot of questions.” 

“Yes.” 

“Thanks,” Kunsel said softly. 

“Don’t mention it.” 

“You’re a great teddy.” 

“No, really, don’t mention it,” said Rude warningly. 

“My balls still itch.” 

Rude rolled his eyes. “…so tired of your shit.” 

“That’s what they all say.” 

“I hate you.” 

“No, you don’t. You love me.” 

“No, I don’t. I really don’t.” 

“Do, too.” 

“Shut up.” 

“Come over here and make me.” 

“Don’t tempt me.” 

“See, I knew you loved me!” 

“Shut. Up.” 

**Author's Note:**

> Mahokoyuki wrote a great companion piece for the FF7 Fanworks Exchange 2019 as a gift for me, called "Found and Lost".... a 'missing scene' about the mission Rude was alluding to, when he and Kunsel were at the Great Glacier and the Northern Crater. Here's the link! :)   
> (nsfw content)  
> https://archiveofourown.org/collections/2019Exchange/works/20158735


End file.
